The days of going on a first date with someone you know nothing about are basically over, thanks to the Internet. You could look up your potential new love interest online and find out practically anything about them, but that can also be pretty creepy. While you want to do some research on this stranger, how much is too much?
According to most dating and relationship experts, “less is more” is the right approach. You want to do enough research to feel safe going out with this person without going too far down the rabbit hole into your date’s past. “I think not doing any cyberstalking at all is too little,” says Julie Nguyen, a certified dating coach with the dating app Hily. “Everyone has a digital footprint, and checking out a few of their profiles helps make sure they are who they say they are, especially for women going on a date.”
Experts say this is how to decide on the right amount of pre-first-date research:
- Focus on sensible “cyberstaling” - It’s normal to be curious about your date, so start with verifying what you already know about them. Confirm they work where they say they do by checking out their LinkedIn and get a feel for their personality by scrolling through their Instagram.
- When it becomes overkill - Things like running a paid background check or combing their social media profiles to do a deep dive into their past and looking at their ex’s tagged photos are definitely too much.
- Check for red flags - Not having an online footprint is a major one. Even if they don’t like social media, most people have a LinkedIn profile, if they don’t and you feel like something is off, you may want to reconsider meeting up in person.
- Don’t overprepare - This is a date, not a job interview, so don’t spoil the genuine way you get to know someone by researching more than you need to.
Source: Huff Post⠀